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June will address an inquiry from those wishing to manifest their
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Special Feature: 8
Rules to Resume Righting - Remember the KISS Method, Keep it Simple,
Sweetheart - Catherine
Reid-Turk, President of CDT Business Solutions, Inc.
Coach June is an expert article writer at
EzineArticles. Read what she has to say...
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Question
from Ella, Monterey CA:
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Dear
Coach June:
Just four months ago I stepped into a new phase of my life by separating from my husband.I have scant savings, children to support and a mortgage.
Since then my job was eliminated but I have started
another business. Doors in my life life continue to open
yet still I feel stuck with indecision and paralyzed with fear. How do
I overcome the fear?
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Dear Ella ;
It
is a real challenge to not feel fear during this time of our history, is
it not? But fears can be soothed by calming one's self (take a deep breath) and approaching a fear with clarity and logic.
In
coaching, fear is often referred to as the "gremlins." They come
out more than just after midnight: They tease us all day long and grow
in numbers.
A
coach understands that gremlins will emerge as soon as the client sets
sail to reach her goals. Therefore, when
charting the client's strategy and then taking steps is when the
gremlins come to the party and fears play havoc with the goals.
Coach listens to the client's "reasons" to why her valued goals might not be fulfilled
.
Most clients can make those reasons (I call them the "whys")
sound quite reasonable and logical. More often than not, they are not.They are the
fears/gremlins.
Now Coach June is seasoned enough to understand that not all fears are illogical,irrational.
or without merit. They can
actually be a warning sign that something is not clear in the goal
(maybe it really isn't of value to the client), or within the client's
plan,
strategic steps, or within the client herself. One way or another ,gremlins
must be addressed because they make a lot of noise and keep success away.
The best approach to the gremlin is to talk about it as though it is a goal. Now the fear becomes a sub-goal. A sub-goal gives the plan support. Sub-goals are the steps thus part of the
strategy that forward goals.
For instance: Financial planning. I need more money to survive, but my paycheck doesn't cover my basic needs.
Coach inquires: What are you going to do about this? What is your plan?
If you answer, I don't know,
then together we review your possibilities and options. If you have a
plan then both of us continue forward to manifest results.
If
the gremlins become greater than the values to achieve the goal, I
recommend not 1. making it a step and/or 2. not giving that goal
priority at this time 3. focusing on another goal. This is because if
the client becomes too fearful to realize a sense of success or
fulfillment she will think that all is useless or panic and do more
damage to her financial situation.
But to achieve a progress, a step forward, is often what propels the client to deal more securely with her greatest fears.
You are faced with many unknowns and in fact, are facing
what you might have dreaded (or feared) the most all along in your plan for independence - job elimination, scant
savings, bills and children to care for.
Take
one or two goals at a time and come up with a plan rather than let all
of your fears play merrily away. Prioritize which goals you are
willing to research in regards to options and possibilities.
Also, give yourself permission to have, or be open to having, Plan A,
B, C and maybe D for each
goal. Flexibility.With flexibility the fears usually don't have the
same hold because you are willing to explore other options.
Do assign target dates to each step to complete so that the fears don't
keep you from moving forwad.
I hope this helps you move beyond your fears and stay steady on your course for a new life.
Coach June
For a jump
start you might want to listen to the guided meditation in Meditation Room on this site.
Coach
June
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Note:
We reserve the
right to post any questions received from this link.
Please contact June by clicking here.
You can reach us any time at: june@sfcoaching.com
June Callaghan Eureka Valley
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